Real Vampires Don't Diet by Gerry Bartlett
From the Author's Website:
First Glory's stood up on New Year's Eve by her long time main squeeze Jeremy Blade. Then a moonlight boat ride on Austin's Lake Travis with newly turned vampire, rock star Israel Caine (Ray) goes horribly wrong. Who knew there was a Siren lurking in the lake just waiting for her chance to lure unsuspecting vampires into a trap? Now Glory and Ray are racing against time to find vampire sacrifices or they're doomed.
With the storm of the century threatening to wash out her new home and an old enemy taking aim at her, things don't look good for Glory.
As for her relationship with Blade? Well, Glory wonders if maybe it's time to cut her longtime lover loose.
Valdez is at her side as usual, along with her friends who won't let Glory go down without a fight. Surely all this action is bound to help our curvy vamp lose a pound or two. You think?
I've liked Glory since I first started the series with book two, Real Vampires Live Large. There's something about an overweight vampire, with a great vintage clothing store, a self depreciating sense of humor, great friends, and a shifter for a body guard. However, for some unknown reason, I've never added Real Vampires to my must buy list, and I never seem to know when a new one has been released. For that very reason, it wasn't until recently when I ordered the latest two books in the series. It took me quite a while to really get into Live Large, and I still don't know what I think.
What I do know is that I'm fairly sick of the back and forth relationship Glory has with Blade and her role as mentor to the newly made vampire Israel Caine is starting to annoy me, since Glory can't seem to pick which man she wants. I'm a firm believer in shit or get off the potty and Glory's interaction with the men in her life left me extremely cold with this last one. So much so that I haven't even cracked the spine on Real Vampire's Hate Their Thighs. I've no doubt I'll read it--eventually--but I think I need a breather for a while.
I have to give this one a C. I just didn't feel it as much as I did the others, but Bartlett's excellent and funny writing make it worth a read.
Sucker For Love by Kimberly Raye
Divalicious darling of the undead Lil Marchette is this close to finding her own happily-ever-after with hunky live-in bounty hunter Ty Bonner. Unfortunately, reality is biting back in a big way. Lil’s got mounting bills to pay and clients to keep happily hooked up courtesy of Dead End Dating, the ultimate meet-and-greet for New York’s fanged, furry, and fabulous. But leave it to a drop-dead gorgeous eight-hundred-year-old warlock with a big-girl fetish to take the biggest chomp out of Lil’s happiness by kidnapping Esther Crutch, one of Lil’s plus-size clients, now stamped as Grade-A Ritual Meat.
Leaving Ty warming the bed, Lil races to rescue Esther’s curvy behind before she’s turned into a Mayan sacrifice. The trail leads to Texas–hell by any other name–and as if dust, demons, and hopelessly outdated fashion weren’t bad enough, fate gives Lil an unexpected partner: her mom, who is on a mission to meddle (as usual) and grab a little mother-daughter time. Will Lil remain calm in the face of smotherly love and save Esther–or will her client bite the dust?
Sigh. I'm about to make you think I disliked all the books I've read in my long silences, but really, that's not true. What is true is that I didn't really feel this one either. Perhaps I'm growing tired of the sameness that is this particular brand of female vampire. You know, the I'm really nice, hate blood, can kick ass if I need too, but really hate too, and I'm really just a sucker for true love. It was a nice break for a while, and perhaps when the state of current affairs was cleaner, there was a place in my heart for such books. Now though, I find myself wanting more from the heroines of the books I read. I want grit. I don't want fashion and boys to be the top priority.
In truth, I enjoyed this latest adventure of Lil much more than the others and I liked it enough to read the next one, whenever it may be released. I've never been a large fan of this series to begin with so my expectations were low, giving me the freedom to give this one a B-.
I'm out of blogging time for today, hopefully I'll be back tomorrow.